A phone call away
I call Beijing from my temp office trying to catch Yang and the kids before they head off to work and school respectively. Yang is just stepping out of the shower -- suddenly i feel i've been away too long -- so she hands the phone to Aidan. Aidan tells me he has a stomach ache. This is his way of avoiding school. When reminded he just finished breakfast without any sign of stomach problems he quickly switches to a headache. I can feel his slight smile at playing this trick, him knowing I know what he's trying to do yet doing it anyway. Aidan's giddiness is almost palatable on the phone and causes me to smile. We talk bit, Aidan asking for toys from America and me promising at least one.
I ask to speak with Lydia and I hear Aidan yell mèi mei, bàbà diàn huà (妹妹, 爸爸 电话). Lydia won't come to the phone, so Yang brings it to her. Lydia won't take it and becomes feisty. I can hear her say "no" and in my mind i see her squirming away from the phone. She doesn't want to speak with me because her English isn't very good and my Chinese is worse. During the eight days I've been away she's only taken the phone once but I keep trying. She must think I'm a little slow. During my last trip to the states, I was a bit more successfully with Lydia but our conversations consisted of me asking her lame questions (are you going to school today? how was the park? do you eat yet) and her responding "yes....yes....yes". It was worth it.
(Lydia wondering why her father cannot speak chinese)
But when I made that trip it was during a time I was making more of an effort to spend time with Lydia. In the past six weeks prior to this trip, I haven't been making enough time for her and it does have an effect. On any given weeknight, I would come home at night when she's already asleep and then leaving in the morning prior to her waking. And while Aidan is free with his affections, Lydia is a bit more picky. You've got to earn it with her.
Yang gets back on the line, gives me an update on her side projects...both personal and professional. In email the day before, she tells me she's been home for dinner five nights in a row. Me being cynical think this means she will for sure have a mahjong night which did indeed come to pass. Me, it's been too many nights away and my brain is being interrupted with work intruder thoughts so even though i am on the call, i am not on the call. i need to work on that.
It's weird being being half way around the world from them. Knowing that they are sleeping when I am working, that they are awake when I am asleep. That they seem to manage just fine without me..not that I am not missed and all..but life goes on.
I remove the cell phone from my ear, click on the hang up button, and return to my work.