Christmas 2023

My alarm goes off at 7am but I'm already awake. Not awake from the excitement of Christmas morning but awake because I'm a morning person. That and I'm old and need to pee.

Amanda and Sabrina are asleep next to me. Elisa is in the next room. In recent years we've opened presents about mid-day but on this Christmas Elisa has volleyball camp so we decide to open gifts before she needs to leave. Elisa wakes soon after me and we share American style donuts for breakfast which has become a bit of a tradition. Elisa has the glaze and I have the boston cream. I wake up Sabrina and Amanda and we are soon gathered in front of our mid size tree that sits atop a coffee table. It is the best looking tree we've had since moving to China thanks to Sabrina (I had a habit of somehow buying sad looking Christmas trees).

Lydia texts me the night before - she wants to live stream the gift opening from Toronto but I can't connect with her. So we go, taking turns. We have pretty much everything we need and I've run out of Apple products to buy the kids so there are no big gifts per say. I bought blanket hoodies for Elisa and Lydia. Aidan will get his gift in a few days. For Amanda's first Christmas, we (Sabrina) dresses her up in festive red. Santa gives her a teletubby.

Lydia comes online and shares a video she made as a gift to the family. It had a cute and catchy song she made with the help of AI. Sabrina grabbed the images the video has made of. I love the drawings and how they reflected our year. Anxious, lonely, tired, new apartment, and Amanda.

For Christmas, I make my mom's pot roast and lasagna. It's not particularly difficult cooking. I look forward to it. The shopping. The anxiety on finding ricotta. Having enough sauce. While we opened presents at our home, for the meal we transported the food to Yang's apartment where her mom lives. Of course, Yang's mom didn't get the memo that I was preparing the meal and had lunch waiting for us. I was annoyed. Good to be in touch with those feelings. So we ate a light lunch and waited a few hours for the main course. We ate while watching Home Alone Six. Devil eggs, chips and dip were of course served.

I miss the days waking up in the same house with all the kids and on Christmas morning their excitment over the gifts. But those days are gone. Aidan and Lydia are grown and growing. Elisa, 15, will be joining them soon. But we do have Amanda and years of joy.