Cold and bent

It is cold and the conversation colder. I am bored and take a sip of diet coke and play with my cell phone. I tell myself that I should be more social, so I lean forward and try to listen. Try really hard. But my mind still drifts, unfocused, not able to engage. My defense mechanism.  Then I am hot and I wonder if my health may be slipping away. No one else seems hot. My right arm is sore from the shoulder to the wrist and I wonder why that is. I stretch out my leg…preparing to stand… but not standing yet. The preparation is to offset the boredom. My knee has a kink and gets stuck during the extension. It hurts. I grimace. No one seems to notice. But I do, boy do I. I get up and make my way to the restroom. Looking cool I think. My second thought is no one looks cool walking to the restroom. It is like everyone can picture you standing there dick in hand waiting for the flow stop. As if people are judging if I am a tinkler or a faucet. I get back to the table and I am still hot. At least in spots.