Laowai Haven

Foreigners (Laowai) are not expected to understand anything about China and that can be a haven for someone who has never felt like he belonged anywhere. Or it can just be really annoying. Today's post covers a couple of annoyances.

Yang's mom, Pan Yi Hong, was set to land in Beijing after a six month stay in Boise, Idaho. The fact that she could stand spending six months in Boise, with her son, is incomprehensible but then again many things are incomprehensible about Pan Yi Hong. I was originally going to fly the San Francisco to Beijing leg of the flight with Pan Yi Hong, in fact I booked my return flight from the states to so that I might be of some assistance. Pan Yi Hong is fairly old after all and has the strange needs older people get. Well, I suspect, age is not a factor in her case. And as it turned out I did not take that flight with her as she missed her originating flight from Boise to San Francisco. And when she did get the originating flight the next day, it was delayed landing in San Francisco and she missed her connecting flight to Beijing. After spending the night in Fremont with her beloved daughter-in-law she finally boarded United Airlines 889 to Beijing. This is where I re-enter the story.

Yang had one of her endless tennis tournaments so after dropping her off, I headed to the airport to pick up Pan Yi Hong. I got to the airport and still feeling jet lag of my own went to the Starbucks and got a coffee to go. UA889 had already landed but with immigration and the slow walking speed of Pan Yi Hong, it didn't matter much, or so I thought. I put on my headphones and waited. And waited. An hour after arrival and she still wasn't out. Should be any minute, I thought. Two hours and still no Pan Yi Hong. I started to get worried or at least impatient so I called Yang who called a friend who worked at the airline who confirmed Pan Yi Hong was indeed on the flight. So then what? Maybe she had gotten ill. I went to the information desk and handed over my phone so Yang could ask if anyone could look for her mom. The information desk clerk was writing down some phone numbers for me when Yang called back to call off the search. Pan Yi Hong was home.

Pan Yi Hong had apparently gotten through immigration fast and upon clearing customs did not see me waiting for her. The waiting area in Beijing Terminal 3's arrivals hall is super crowded and while I would have seen her if indeed I was there when she came out, she would have had a bit hard time spotting me. So, not spotting me, Pan Yi Hong thought for some reason that I might be in the Airport basement and she took the elevator down. She didn't find me in the basement because I've never ever been to it, but she did find a shuttle bus that went to her district of Beijing. She paid the 16 RMB and took it. A couple of hours or so later and after a short taxi ride home she called our apartment. Even though she knew she was being picked up, it never crossed Pan Yi Hong's mind to wait a few minutes or to make a phone call. She just wanted to get home. A simple enough story, no harm, no foul. The part where it becomes an annoyance is when Yang's friends complained to her for sending me to the Airport. Not because Yang should have maybe adjusted one of her tennis games to go which I would partially agree, but because Vince, as a foreigner was incapable of picking up Pan Yi Hong. Not a single "to bad your mom didn't call" but rather just a chorus of "why did you send Vince?"

The second annoyance was when I took a ride to the Airport for my last US trip 1.5 week ago. We have a driver that takes Aidan and Lydia to school every day and I asked him to take me to the airport after dropping the kids off (yes, we are that spoiled). Actually, I asked Aidan to ask him since my Mandarin is still that pathetic. I was tempted to drive myself but thought that might make the driver uncomfortable so I sat quietly in the passenger seat. Once the kids were dropped off, it was a short drive to the 2nd Ring Road and then from there a couple of miles to the Airport Expressway. We dropped the kids off and he made a U-turn away from the 2nd Ring Road. I pointed and said 2nd Ring Road in Chinese and he said something back that I didn't understand. What I thought he was trying to tell me was that he was avoiding the traffic in front of the school and would get to the 2nd Ring Road another way. "Stupid", I thought, but "OK" and I just nodded. Then we drove straight through the intersection where he would have needed to turn left to reach the 2nd Ring Road and I pointed a bit more forcefully and said 2nd Ring Road. He then tried to explain to me that the 2nd Ring Road went in a circle and did not go to the Airport. I tried to say the Airport Expressway connected to it but didn't know how to say that in Chinese so I just pointed and said 2nd Ring Road again. He wasn't buying it. Doesn't matter if this foreigner has been in Beijing for eight years and has driven to the Airport 50 times. The silly foreigner doesn't know that ring roads goes in a circle.

And with that my old friend anger returned and I lost it. Yet I was a loss for words to yell at the driver in Chinese. I just kind of grunted and fumed and leaned my head against the window as we hit every damn light on the driver's path to the Airport Expressway. By the time he dropped me off I felt bad for losing my temper but not bad for being annoyed. No matter how long a foreigner has lived here, he still knows nothing. See nothing. Feels something.