59

Age is just a number. Expat or immigrant? Retired or unemployed?

I turned 59 today. On a Saturday. It used to be weekend birthdays were a luxury back when I worked. Way back to a month ago. Now Saturday is much like a Wednesday except Elisa doesn't need to go to school. I wake up with Happy Birthday texts from Toronto; from Aidan, Lydia, and Yang. Rest of my morning was pretty much the same - while Sabrina, Amanda, Elisa, and Kobe slept, I worked out, then had oats and coffee. Read the latest news - conspiracy theories or collusion?

Once Sabrina and Amanda are up, Kobe wakes. And then we are bundled up and out the door to walk Kobe. I run into a young couple walking their small dog that takes in interest in Kobe. "Is he friendly?", she asks. "Mostly." She recoils, the dogs continue to sniff each other.

For birthday lunch, we head over to Yang's apartment where Yang's mom lives. For my birthday, I typically make tacos and bake a cake. I didn't feel like cooking, so we ordered Italian takeout (steak, pork chops, spaghetti, risotto, pizza). Elisa volunteered to make the cake which turned out to be brownies because that's the only mix the expat (immigrant) grocery story had.

Lydia has a gift prepared for me. It's the cover image to this post and inspired by my summer of listening to Chappell Roan. Yang's mom gave me hongbao (cash) which is always appreciated. She's the generation that still uses cash. Sabrina gave me a kind of leisure pants, taking the hint that it's all I've been wearing and I only have one pair. Amanda give me the gift of play.

I'm feeling many things as I enter my 60th year. I'm going to embrace the uncertainty, the freedom. I'm going to relish the days, like today, when my body feels fresh and spy. I'm going to lean into reading and wisdom. I'm going to be there for my children. I'm going to push myself when I have the energy and reflect when I feel spent.