I am carrying Lydia as we walk back to our hotel in the English Bay section in Vancouver. My closest childhood friend Jose is a half block ahead walking with his five year old daughter. I am talking with his wife Sarah while Yang, Elisa, and Aidan are a half block back. This being an older neighborhood, a strip of relatively well maintained grass separates the street edge from the sidewalk.  My left foot lands half on the sidewalk and half on the grass, something my ankle was unprepared for. It turns and gives way meaning I fall forward with nothing but Lydia to break my fall. I instinctively let go of Lydia as we near the ground and she lands hard. In the half second I had, I was able divert my fall away from her. A beat passes. Then Lydia is crying, a cry which is a bit of a relief since it means she wasn’t hurt that bad. I pull her close and wish her a happy birthday.

These past three weeks have seen the birthdays of three of the most important ladies in my life. My mom on July 25th, Lydia on August 1st, and finally Elisa on August 6th. For my mom’s birthday, a cross section of the Allio family took an inside passage cruise to Alaska. At first, it didn’t seem like the Beijing Allio’s would fit into that cross section given the kids, the distance, the expense. Then Yang, upon hearing of the trip said, without hesitation, “let’s do it, this is life” and we were committed. And I was glad we went. There was the birthday celebration part, held formally at the Pinnacle Grill on the ship, that was for sure a highlight. The real value for me was the time spent with Yang and the kids. With work and the support system we have in China there is seldom a need for me to do much parenting (although I do a little bit here and there). I had one fantasy that I would be able to take down my mom’s family story during the trip and then regurgitate it into some kind of readable prose as a gift, but as it turned out we mostly saw each other at meals or passing from one end of the ship to the other.

Mom’s birthday dinner

For Lydia’s birthday the thing I will most beyond the falling remember was looking in her eyes as we sang Happy Birthday. They did this kind of sideways sparkle when all the attention was on her and it felt good to see that she was feeling it. It wasn’t as if she wasn’t expecting attention – indeed she had mentioned to Aidan the Yang would have told the entire restaurant. We ended up singing her happy birthday twice, once at the Italian restaurant and latter over desert.  The dessert was a bit improvised, we just stopped at an ice cream store which had cakes and bought some candles. Yang then took a candle onto the street looking for someone with a light. Once let, wish taken, and candles out the kids dug into the ice cream cake.

Isabella (Jose’s daughter), Lydia, and Aidan get to work.

Elisa’s birthday was the day we retuned to Beijing. Aidan too the remaining savings he had of 8 RMB and went to the market next door to buy Elisa a gift. He got her a stuffed animal – a squirrel because it was something the kids enjoyed during an outing in Vancouver. Upon getting the gift, Elisa said she didn’t like it leaving Aidan broken hearted. We again got an ice cream cake and Elisa held court as wishes were made and promises taken.