Elisa turned three yesterday and my main thought about her is that like most three year olds she lives in the moment, and what a beautiful thing that is. When she wants ice cream, she wants it. When she eats it, she is consumed with eating it. When she’s done with it, she’s done with it.

I’m not sure when living in the moment passes and we start to reflect on the past, plan for the future, and simply not be present with those we are present with. But it happens and the next thing you know we are checking our phone to see what our friends are up to ignoring the friends sitting across from us. So I take my time with Elisa, let her draw me into her moments, try to put my cell phone down and just be. Occasionally I succeed.

One of the moments was her birthday party yesterday. Elisa controlled the guest list, ruling out friends who were just Lydia’s friend. Yang had to check with Elisa before inviting one of Aidan’s friends to come and was relieved when Elisa agreed. Elisa’s closest friend since Weili left is a boy her age but he could not make it and the friends who came were slightly older than Elisa with one a bit younger. They played princess dress up and Yang put makeup on them. Elisa was eager to play with her toes but not hyper eager like some kids get.

Elisa was as happy playing with the bubble wrap as with the toys inside.

The living in the moment and being present with those present is on my mine a lot, to the point it can interfere with the being in the moment. I was thinking about it after my run this morning when Yang called from the hospital. Yang had taken her mom to see her best friend, a woman Yang’s mom has known since she was ten. The friend’s time is coming to a close and for only the second time in her life Yang saw her mom break into uncontrollable tears, the first time being back when Yang’s grandfather died many years ago.

So Elisa’s day came and went and Elisa just rolled into the next thing, which this morning was riding on the back of my bike to the 798 Art District, reaching forward and hugging me, happy as a lark.