Aidan is out with Yang and somehow they know Elisa wants an Ice Cream. One of those three kuai McDonalds ice creams. What were called “frosties” when I was a kid. Yang buys it and Aidan holds it for Elisa. Aidan does not take a bit or even a small lick but concentrates on keeping the cone upright and the ice cream on the cone. It takes them a while to get home and involves a stop or two. When Yang and Aidan finally make it home Aidan walks through the door holding the ice cream for Elisa. Aidan looks a bit tired from the concentration it took to keep the treat in tact. Elisa meets them, sits down and takes the cone from Aidan. After Elisa takes a couple of licks Aidan asks Elisa if he can have a bite. “No” comes the definitive response. Aidan and Yang explain all the hard work Aidan did in getting the ice cream home. Elisa understands. Again, can Aidan have a bite? “No”.

This got me thinking about being nice. Elisa is the sweetest and most caring 3.5 year old I can imagine. When she wants to be. When it suits her. When it doesn’t, she has no problem to be selfish. Lydia is pretty much the same way.

Aidan on the other hand is learning that you should be nice even when you really don’t feel like being nice. This is especially the case now because he’s been going through more and more things where he doesn’t feel like being pleasant. Part of my job as a parent is to remind him not to take his frustration out on others. He doesn’t always understand this, but he is getting there. And I guess the lesson is if you can’t be nice, at least do not be mean.

Me, I’m trying to become more like my 3.5 year old which is one of the advantages of middle age.