Aidan is starting to see my flaws and Lydia is starting to see my values. I'll call this progress.

During our vacation Aidan noticed a toy gumball machine. One of those put in a quarter, turn the handle a few times, and a round hard piece of gum drops down. But in this case, the gumball machine was not dropping gum, but rather small plastic egg enclosed toys. And it wanted four quarters, not one. Aidan is a bit of a toy addict and as soon as he spotted the pokemon gumball machine he was asking for me to buy him one.  I first told him no, too expensive. Then I told him I didn't have four quarters. He protested, at which point I showed him all the coins in my pocket. The problem being that I actually did have four quarters.  So, now I was stuck buying the toy. But the pokemon gumball machine was jammed, it would not take my quarters. Aidan wanted me to try anyway, I tried to show him that it was broken. He settled for another toy from a neighboring gumball machine.

Later, that night, I am giving Aidan a bath. This is maybe eight or nine hours later. He mentions the pokemon gumball machine again. Says he thinks it wasn't broken. That we just needed to try harder. I try to explain again. And then for the pivotal moment -- Aidan says that another man could have done it. So, there it is, the first (expressed) disillusionment with baba.

Now for Lydia. I've said a few times that while Aidan's affection is unconditional, Lydia makes you earn it. This vacation was a chance for me to earn it. I spent a lot of time with her and because she is..shall we say..high maintenance...scratch that...a normal four year old. When she was too tired to walk, I carried her. When she wanted to draw, I found her paper. When she threw a fussy fit, I'd listen to her. The thing about Lydia is that at four she is more self aware than some 40 year olds I know. She knows she's being fussy when she's fussy, she just has a hard time controlling it. Anyway, I digress. As the two weeks passed I could feel Lydia getting closer and closer to me. Until that magical moment the day before I returned to Beijing.

Lydia on the toilet and yells out "popo done" and Yang tells her she will be right in to wipe her. Lydia yells back that she wants baba to do it.

I could not be more pleased.

 
Lydia watching over Elisa in Old Sacramento