I'll remember this

Jackson Browne, in a song to his son, wrote that of all those thoughts thought crowd your head only a few will really matter. I would maybe add, that for all those thoughts that crowd your head, you'll only remember a few, and they won't really matter. I feel this way a lot; that my memory is bad to awful but the things I can remember are really insignificant. Some days, insignificant and inaccurate. I remember that the CCTV sports highlight show comes on at noon but it is in Chinese and I can't make sense of it. They show NBA game highlights and the highlights don't really have anything to do with the result, kind of like those still pictures HBO puts out for heavyweight title fights. And after the series of random highlights comes the part I'm waiting for, who won. For this is one thing I remember from childhood. Winning is important. They flash the score, the numbers readable but the team names are in Chinese, so I'm am left with useless highlights and a score I cant understand. More crowded useless thoughts for my overworked one cylinder brain. Then there are those thoughts that fly into my brain from nowhere and without meaning. The distracters. I'll be on the phone and people will ask me if Im still there. "Why, yes" I want to say "I'm here, I was just thinking if I have five kuai for the subway or if I will need to break a 100." Some such nonsense like this. These flying thoughts know not prejudice, they will interrupt me whether I am having the most important conversation of my career or squatting to pee. Then there are those thoughts that wake me up at night. Or is it that I wake up first and then the thoughts come. I'll have to think about it. But either way, the nighttime thoughts are the worst. They have no focus and circle around and around. When I try to focus on another thought such as my son's running or my daughter's laugh or the ones who left too soon I find myself more awake so I turn the TV on to distract me. Thank goodness for CNN, always boring enough to put me to sleep. Until the next thought.