I have just joined a conference call at work and I’m waiting for it to get started. It doesn’t look to be a very exciting call. One of those calls where either my manager or myself should be on the call, but not both. So I take a peek at facebook on my phone to check in on my niece Catie’s status. She’s dead. I reread the post from my sister in law a few times to make sure there’s no misunderstanding. There is none. My body heaves. The call continues. ...
Aidan comes into the room bleeding from scraps on and near his knee. He says how much it hurts. I ask him what happened and he said he fell off his bike. This is not too hard to imagine. He gets going fast enough that he loses control or runs into a curb and down he goes. I check out the wounds which are just a bit deeper than skin scraps and ask him to wash it off. He will be fine. ...
I heard recently that scientists have pinned down the age kids go from adorable to annoying. It is 4.5 years old. I am thinking about this when Elisa comes into the room and says to me, “Baba, teach me all English”. I know why she is asking and her intent is pure. She is just so perfect for a toddler not quite four. I know this moment, the way she is at this precise age, will be gone. It will be gone before I even notice it. That’s just the way kids age in a parent’s eyes. It’s like seeing that one week old baby and remembering what your kids where like then. Even if that memory is hard to grasp. ...
I am pushing Elisa in her stroller when I notice her head leaning to the right. I sneak a look at her face and see her eyes closed. Nap time. I keep pushing her to Lido Park where I prop the stroller flat and let her sleep. I stand and listen to podcasts all the while thinking this is the last spring I will be doing this with her. With any child. Until maybe our kids have kids of their own. ...
I am at The Den with my friend Steve and we have just ordered dinner and a beer. We’ve been meeting at The Den every Wednesday night for about a year. It is 2008, my third year in Beijing and Steve’s forth. Strangely enough the early years for an expat in Beijing are often the easiest. You are busy trying to learn the language, the culture, and the bustling city drags you along. There are waves of new foreigners in town that are having similar experiences and it is easy to feel connected. Opportunity feels limitless, even if no real opportunity is at hand. Everything is just so new that you feel renewed. At least the part of you that isn’t feeling homesick and isolated, for sure that is part of the experience as well. ...
It’s 7:05am and I take the elevator down with Aidan and Lydia. I get off at the first floor while they keep going to the parking garage. Off to school they go, off to work I go. I put on my respro face mask to help filter out the car exhaust and pollution. I put on my gloves to deal with the mid 30s “spring” mornings and then I’m off. Well, for about 50 meters when I have to stop, take out an electric key, and open the world’s most annoying gate that our apartment complete recently installed. A gate they installed to keep, I’m assuming hypothetical thieves out but in fact does a remarkable job at keeping residents in. ...
Aidan is out with Yang and somehow they know Elisa wants an Ice Cream. One of those three kuai McDonalds ice creams. What were called “frosties” when I was a kid. Yang buys it and Aidan holds it for Elisa. Aidan does not take a bit or even a small lick but concentrates on keeping the cone upright and the ice cream on the cone. It takes them a while to get home and involves a stop or two. When Yang and Aidan finally make it home Aidan walks through the door holding the ice cream for Elisa. Aidan looks a bit tired from the concentration it took to keep the treat in tact. Elisa meets them, sits down and takes the cone from Aidan. After Elisa takes a couple of licks Aidan asks Elisa if he can have a bite. “No” comes the definitive response. Aidan and Yang explain all the hard work Aidan did in getting the ice cream home. Elisa understands. Again, can Aidan have a bite? “No”. ...
It is Tuesday night and I get home from work a little after 7pm, 12 hours after I left home. I am tired and hungry. The kids have had dinner with Aidan and Lydia watching their respective TVs. Elisa comes up to me and wants to help make my dinner. We go to the kitchen where she helps scoop my premade chicken curry and beef chili. I nuke it for two and half minutes and ask Aidan if he’s done his homework yet. Aidan starts his homework and is immediately frustrated. To the point that he’s almost shaking and using harsh language. I work with him on some long division problems and try to remember myself how to do it. This frustrates him even more. The next night he is even more frustrated. Same with the next day. ...
The young, skinny waitress with a buzz cut came to take our order. Yang tells her we will have “the tree salad” and she says she doesn’t know what that is. I point at the menu and she copies down the Chinese characters for “the tree salad”. It is slightly odd that she doesn’t know what “the tree salad” is since this particular pizza joint is called “The Tree”. It was the buzz cut waitress’s first day on the job. Later, after she had a hard time knowing what a Guinness was and knowing what a diet coke was an experienced slender buzz cut waitress came to help her out. ...
Elisa sits in the dinning room chair as I put on her socks and then shoes. Elisa does not like to wear socks even as our apartment’s floor gets colder and colder with each passing winter’s day. I zip up her Angry Birds winter coat and we head down to the parking garage. On the slow walk to the car Elisa tells me she wants to hear the songs I like on the drive. This is a first. Normally she just wants to hear Coldplay’s “Yellow” as many times as I can bear it. ...