Elisa, you are amazing. I’m not sure what the future will bring for you but I am sure you will meet it head on, give it a slight nod and a taut smile. You are such a capable child. Scratch that. Capable adult. You use your smarts to do hard things (including Econ) and I’m even more impressed by your emotional intelligence and maturity. I know it hasn’t always been easy.
Let me get the advice section out of the way. I could tell you not to make up your mind too easily, to linger in the uncertainty for all its beauty. I could tell you not to worry about having what you want but to focus on wanting what you have. I could tell you that when you find someone to love and someone who loves you to never let them go. I could tell you to chase your dreams but never be caught by them. I could tell you family above all else and you get to define what family means to you. I could tell you mutts make good dogs and god exists in water smoothed rocks. I could tell you to create and to find art in everything you do. But I won’t tell you these things, for they are the lessons only you can learn. To earn.
It’s true - and now can be told - that you were a bit of a surprise to your mom and me. We thought we were done with kids after your siblings. I am beyond grateful that life doesn’t go as planned. You did cause your mom a bit of morning sickness those first few months of pregnancy. I am confident in saying you are the first Allio to be born in Beijing. Family legend, and I guess it’s true, is your mom walked home with you after giving birth. You were three days old when you first went to Solano Mall.
Relatively recently you told me that when your mom and I broke up, it was like I disappeared for a couple of years. I thought about the little girl who felt like she lost her father. I am so sad for that little girl. One of my happiest moments was when I figured out how you and your siblings could stay with me every other week. You were five at the time. I felt such pride in taking care of the three of you even if I did make the worst lunches. You were a bit of a picky eater but we found enough places at Utown (Korean BBQ, sushi) and had fun at the arcade after dinner. You’d expectantly waited for me to tell you bedtime stories but truth be told, my stories were not all that good. Friday movie nights became a tradition during that time and you were always so social with whatever friends would come over.
Elementary school, middle school, and high school all went by in slow motion. Also in a blur. You changed. You stayed the same. You got interested in dance, photography, sports. You did exceptionally well in school. I’ve seen a lot of growth in you these past two years. How you take care of yourself and care about others. I think of how for my 60th birthday you made sure to spend the day with me. I think about how you organized trips this summer with your friends. I think of how you felt and dealt with the stress of the IB exams. I was proud of you no matter the score and you nailed it at the 98th percentile.
As you head off to Canada for college, I’ll end where I started. I don’t know what the future will bring for you. Whatever it is, I am sure you will thrive, with a wink.
I love you,
Dad